Under the guidance of a Tae Kwon Do master, I had my first profound realisation with meditation
Alleyn is a writer, martial artist, and meditation practitioner. He has lived in and travelled throughout east Asia where he feels right at home. Until he finishes the novel that will unite humanity, bring world peace, and enlighten the universe, you’ll find him online, grafting as copy writer.
Throughout my life, I at times struggled with anger and anxiety. Rather serendipitously, I found the Korean martial art, Tae Kwon Do, or rather it found me, in my youth and set me on a different path. Through Tae Kwon Do, I was first introduced to meditation. Like all martial arts, Tae Kwon Do teaches self-control, so meditation compliments training perfectly.
Meditation was always practiced at the beginning and end of each Tae Kwon Do class. Our teacher used it as a tool to help us focus on our training and self-control. As an overthinker, I found it almost impossible to quieten my mind for long, so meditation became a battle. I spent most of the time scolding myself for not having immediately mastered the skill.
About a year into my training, I attended a Tae Kwon Do camp in Wales where I was introduced to my teacher’s teacher – a Tae Kwon Do master. Each morning, before training, the master led us on longer, more complex guided meditation journeys. It was during one of his sessions that something clicked for me and I was able to experience the power of meditation for the first time.
As we lay on the ground, the master guided us through an energy light-field meditation. We imagined that we were surrounded by pure white light and as we breathed in, this energy entered and filled our bodies. I could see the light, I could feel it enter and revive me, I felt completely calm, and I was able to resist the urge to follow my thoughts. Like never before, I was completely focused and at peace. I knew that something special was happening. All sense of time and the outside world slipped away. There was only the blissful feeling of calmness and the image of myself surrounded by light.
Eventually, our master brought us back. He said something that I have never forgotten. He told us to register the feeling of peace, to put a pin in it. He said that whatever peaceful state we were in at that moment was always present within us. He told us that we had opened a road within our minds to this state and that the road was always open, no matter what is going on around us. It was an incredible moment of realisation for me.
In the years since, I have continued to practice meditation outside of Tae Kwon Do. And although I am more experienced, that moment still stands out for me. Understanding that inner peace is a choice is what made the experience so profound. Once we know and accept that, we can choose to return to it, we can choose how to act, and we can choose not to let our emotions control us. Realising that we have a choice is the key to empowerment, self-control, and growth. Of course, it’s easy to say and difficult to practice. As humans, we are driven by our emotions. We are all prone to panic and anger, it’s an easier route for our brains to take. But by practicing meditation we can open a path to peace and self-control. And the more you open the path, the more likely you are to travel it.
Just knowing that a calm and controlled state exists within and is available at any time is a powerful first step towards self-mastery and a happier, more peaceful way of life. It’s simply a matter of choice.
It has been a while since I have divulged upon this blog. The featured image was a wallpaper I loved to use in middle school. I found it during the Christmas Holidays just near New Years and when AFV was a thing. I always saw it as a silly sunrise. But now it feels like a sad sunset. A goodbye to such an era with Roblox, Algodoo, and Qubo.
I became caught up in work, school, and whatnot. I “let my sorry notions go the way”.
What I did right however was find friends and spend time with them. Perhaps I could have spent more time with family as well, but that is another story for another day. I still made my effort.
Recently, I commented on a nostalgia song “Heist by Ben Folds” to someone who said the movie came out when they were 5 and they were now 17:
Enjoy it while it lasts 🙁 Soon you’ll find yourself warning the others.
Me wasting my youth looking back at more youthful times.
I see why every adult is so stuck in the past. They have all of their world decayed. That’s why they showed us their music, their cartoons, and their stories. I do not think many people are even familiar with the actual fairy tales anymore. And it is rare to find someone of my generation and even more so of the next that is able to climb a mere tree.
I remember playing around exploring stuff. But letting my obsession with being the best spoil the moment. In adolescence I fought with my parents like everyone else-but I realized wars could have been fought more nicely. I cried for the days gone. I miss them.
I have always wondered. what if I were to let go? Let go of those days and start off as a child again? Not in a literal sense. But to carry the lessons that were valuable, and start from scratch? The reason I propose such is from this quote:
But in his carefree youth, it seemed had seem almost like an abstract impossible thing to ever happen to him. Death seemed like an abstract impossible thing to happen to him. But with each passing decade he began to gauge the time he probably had left. And by h is 40s when he considered his halfway point-a best- he had come to know just one thing: You will get older.
The next thing you know, you are looking back, instead of forward.
It’s Such a Beautiful Day by Don Hertzfeldt
The 80s had their memes. And so did the 90s. I was of the 2010s. People rarely remember shoop da whoop and domo. Doge is undead eternal.
But when we were young. We had noothing to mourn. Perhaps it is better that way. To ride with the memes and learn. Not to analyze it like a cringy facebook mom. But to experience it the natural way. You just learn about such.
Who would want to grow up?
It is interesting to find that children can do things that you cannot even if you are older and more experienced. I remember as a child adults being jealous of my ability to not worry.
I am in the middle right now at the age of 19 in college. Hopefully I will not have to “grow up” in the sense that I will be burdened by such worries. If growing up entails that, I do not know why so many people are so insane to go through with such.
It may often be attributed that hard work is a “mature” trait. However, I beg to differ. As child I worked hard to achieve what I really wanted. I would spend hours playing videos games and-ironically-studying. I enjoyed knowing more than everyone else. Being good at everything.
Alas, that is something I have dropped. Sometimes being good was more important than having fun. In that sense, I lost that “grown up” part of me that was so prominent in my childhood.
Slaying some demons
I have been meditating more often. Life is being more in the 4k resolution rather than the 720 or 480p as most would have thought.
I have learned to face fears. In my early stages I was not afraid of anything. I lived life. I saw good in everything. I guess the taint of adulthood is already creeping the moment you come out of the womb. I have also learned that I don’t have to follow anyoness arbitrary ruless. I can be myself. And do as I please.
That is a good thing for some people, a bad thing for others. I’m not one to burn buildings at the tip of a hat. But I was barred from enjoying the popular music given a certain trait that I had. A certain trait that they claimed no one should be judged on, but judge on others themselves. It is controversial. But I have been noticing more people seeing the tomfoolery and transcending the situation. Either way, I’m more of a “bruh” type of guy. I predict in 10 years no one will give a damn like the term “jay”.
In 50 years it will be an oddity. I do not useit here not because I have no inhibition to say it, but I’m more of a “bruh” sort of guy. I guess once you get over the fear of it, you really have not much fear and the ability to do such really becomes irrelevant. (It was considered worse than fuck.) It’s fascinating to see acceptance of others using other wordss that have not even developed a friendly meaning for other groups. But this is the Interdimensional Imbecile and not the Shapiro Show. It’s really irrelevant at this point. I will just say again that I am glad to see more people from everywhere realizing the mess and realizing that it really has evolved into something more friendly. I can finally enjoy modern music without anxiety.
What happened to childhood. Realize I was in the crossfire of a Great War of Pointlesss Shit
Hinting of cultural 3rd Dimensional drama, I believe the only time I can remember not having drama was in childhood. I just remembered playing gamess and seeing all of these adults attempt to teach us kidss to be kind and nice to each other whille slinging shit at each other.
It’s crazy to see how much shit slinging I have gotten to myself.
Perhaps if more people in the word were like children. It would be a nicer place to live.
A free world entails that there will be negativity. There will be bulliess and jerks. It is a part of learning. Without such one is incapable to handle. But standing up for oneself has almost been forbidden by the schools and the bully has the upper hand. One has to have a tooth broken before they gain favor.
We often ban children from participating in certain things due to their lack of development and understanding. But when they accidentally do certain things we treat them as adults as if they fully understood what they did to get revenge instead building them up. Be we limited them because they didn’t. I don’t think that’s the way-as in holding double standards and treating them as one or the other to reach a certain means. It feels as cheaty as a carnival game. A child is a child. A teenager is a teenager. An adult is an adult. I don’t see how people have lost sight of something basic. Don’t just remove meaning from the categories to suit your agenda. Did I say “we”, I mean they. Of course, for the sake of distinction, an adult is not necessarily a “grown up” who slaves over bills and politics. I do not know if I will stick to this terminology but for this article I will.
I really think if we really were to go by the “x is an x” standard. Most of you will agree that adults are mainly the immature ones. Kids are just caught in the crossfire. I’m still caught, but I’m halfway to being an “adult adult”. It seems they only want you to be an adult if they want to charge you with something.
I’m in this weird place now. Sure, I’m 19 and it is Texas and the USA so I am an “adult”. Even if I’m in one of those crazier stick-up-the-ass places, I am capable of quickly finding a means to support myself and live independently. But I still have that “spark of youth” within. I still can do crazy things without getting too many glares. Sure, you have some “fun old men” who are younger in spirit than their own offspring and possess more vitality than most(my grandfather is a prime example, he runs daily and exercises. I know most of you just sit and shit).
High school is a blur now. But it was a trudge. It was only 4 years of my life and it felt so long.. So it gives me hope that I can make the best out of college. The past 2 months also felt long. Given that it was 2020, I could use that as an excuse. But 2 months in high school as a senior also felt long.
Spirituality is messy. At least my path is. Not all rainbows and Firey Chariots.
This reflection isn’t really meant to be a critique on the current state of society. There’s more than enough resources for that. It’s for showing my mental process in processing all of this. There’s a lot of stuff. And I’ll send some more your way as I work my way to astral projection and a full Kundalini raising.
Most of you had probably hoped for a more encouraging piece during these times. But all this spirituality stuff. You realize that you have to master both the Dark and the Light.
One of the most common associations with Night is negativity. There are shadows and darkness and things the creep and crawl. People that literally creep and crawl. Danger around every corner. It is not safe to be outside. You hide in your home with hope that no one will try to break in. You sleep restlessly in the Night in your most vulnerable position.
Why I find the Night beautiful
Other than Dusk and Dawn, I find the Night being more beautiful than Day. When you are with civilization, there are a multitude of sights to see and sounds to hear. People are still out and about having a good time. When driving on the Interstate, the sections with lights are look marvelous. Usually there are just enough people with you driving to keep the darker sections lit without overcrowding the road.
It may seem foolish to walk out at night but there is no heat to beat you down in the summertime. Without the hustle and bustle of the Day, there is a certain sense of peace that overwhelms the soul. As mankind goes to sleep, Nature stays awake. If there was any true “City that doesn’t sleep”, it would be Nature’s kingdom.
A song that would describe a peaceful walk at night would be Oliver Nelson’s “Stolen Moments”. It also goes well with Dusk and Dawn. (This is not an affiliate embed nor my Youtube channel. I make no money off of it. If anything, I am reward with joy for sharing such a chill song with you ^_^)
What about the Danger?
If you are in a state of true love and happiness and alignment at the same time, there is nothing that can harm you. I have not had anything bad happen to me walking outside alone at night. I know there are stories of other people, but those people are neither me nor you. It is one of the most remarkable experiences to “sense” everything around you being filled with love. Even in a dark alleyway there will be peace.
It’s not that the Universe has your back, the Universe is simply providing you with the experience that you have set your consciousness to. If you think about a Beautiful Night you get a Beautiful Night, if you think Spooky Night, then you will get a Spooky Night with Spooky Skeletons and Shivers Down your Spine. (Don’t forget about the Shrieking Skulls that Shock you Soul… And seal your Doom tonight).
Why there is still Fear of the Night
I will be honest that when you first go out at Night alone, there are so many things that look like something could be hiding there. There’s trees, dark alleyways, trashcans, and really sharp corners. It is deeply ingrained within our genetics:
We needed fear to survive lower dimensional consciousness, but we are evolving far beyond that.
What a study on mice says about men
Interestingly, a study done on mice scientifically proved that fearful beliefs can be passed from parent to child without having the child to have the same experience in the child. It involved mice and has yet to be performed on humans(given the nature of the experiment, it needs to be modified so it may be ethically carried out). On the other hand, if mice-which do share similarities with humans-(and thus are the choice of animal test subjects)-are able to pass down fears through generations genetically, it does point out that so can humans.
Even if it is not genetic, fear is still passed down through generations
It is not yet apparent that our fears are passed through our very DNA; however, our very culture, our Consciousness, does have fears ingrained that are taught from parent to child. It makes sense, a society educating their chidren on how to survive.
Moving past outdated lower dimensional fears
You do not need to fear the Night. There is is a Hidden Beauty that is available to you without any danger. As you shift your consciousness into higher realms of peace and love, all threats begin to fade away. Beause you resonate so strongly on Beauty and Awesome Shit, then nothing that doesn’t resonate on that vibration can come close to you.
If you do have any resonance of Unwanted Danger, then the Universe will dutifully bring to you what you have told it to bring to you.
It is usually a long process to work out deep beliefs. I myself am still in that process. The general steps go like this:
Realize you have a fear or outdated belief
Begin to contemplate upon it. Send it love and thank it for the lesson
Release the belief without any resistance.
1-3 Wash, rinse, repeat.
Of course, even though these steps are simple, the execution of even step 1 can be difficult.
Step 1 in Detail
What beliefs do you have right now? Which beliefs serve you? Which ones hold you back. Make a list of possible beliefs if you are not sure. Did you ever have a good moment or wwanted to do something you knew that was good but then your mind hindered you? That’s likely a detrimental belief. Choose one for Step 2.
Step 2 in Detail
Why do you have this belief? Was there an experience that led you to support it? Can you reevaluate such experience? If you don’t know, is there any reason to support the belief? What 3rd Dimensional reasons justify such blieffs? What 4th and 5th Dimensional reasons can you think of? Is the belief out of Love? Can you find a way to turn the belief into Love?
Step 3 in Detail
Are there any reasons to keep this belief? Fear has no true power. It only appears to have power. The only power fear has is power that you have. It is now time to reclaim that power. Let the fear go. Fear is Blockage and thus meditation can be used to overcome and transcend such.
Step 4 in Detail
Letting go of Fear can be a taxing thing. If you need to take a break, by all means take a break. You already have a list from Step 1. If you don’t, you either have cleared all your fears or have some deeper ones. In time they will surface-you can also go deeper towards them.
Be not afraid of that Good Night
I was going to write a general conclusion but I just had an idea for a poem
Be not afraid of That Good Night Be not afraid of That Good Night! Do not fear Darkness, Shadows, and Things that Fright…
Although you may desire to see the Light You may find it within… On that Good Night.
“I want a refund”, I initially thought to myself when the year 2020 disintegrated into utter chaos. What would be a smooth year of smooth sailing and smooth graduating turned into a hectic hell of one global event after the other. Not only is there a pandemic, there is now a culture war raging, and do you know what is the best approach to such? Do what everyone does when the floor is lava: Seek higher ground*cough*frequencies*cough*
Yes, it’s a 3rd dimensional shit show.
Imagine all the drama(yes, that includes every side that is participating) as a literal shit show of shit being thrown around in the shittiest manner. I know there’s a shit ton of profanity in this already.
A lot of problems are being made for the sake of “starting a conversation” and even more problems are being made to address the destruction that has desecrated the data. And then the other side is being beaten up and so on.
I would not fathom to live to the day when leaders have exceeded the drama of pop stars. And for kicking and screaming-something attributed to babies-to be commonplace for adults.
This post is not to side with any 3rd dimensional side or the other. It’s all a shit show.
I have beliefs and you have beliefs but that’s not the point. The point is:
You don’t have to join the 3rd dimensional shit show.
Everyone in the history of everything has desired to enact change in order to reconfigure their environment to match their heart’s desire.
When we were cavemen banging sticks together for fun and survival, we took nature and changed it. As we moved forward in time, we began taking the animals and changing them-turning wolves into dogs. As time went on, we would move from making houses with our bare hands to utilizing massive machinery to lift millions of tons of stone and steel to craft skyscrapers.
Yes, there is validity in using bare hands and banging two rocks together to make a knife. But it is a rather crude method. And when such crude methods are being relied upon to cause massive change for an entire planet, it probably is not the wisest of choices.
Debate has been a time honored method of uncovering the truth. It was a massive upgrade from beating the hell out of anyone who disagrees with you or threatening to use force.
In scarcer times with scarcer consciousness, desperation was an underlying vibration. There was no time to talk, both parties had to agree quickly or else be swept by other forces in the process. If that meant beating up, stealing from, and killing the other human being, so be it.
As time progressed, there would be more opportunities to talk with one’s neighbor. There would be more time allotted to disagree with each other. As scarcity died, Debate was borne. No longer would you need to(immediately) kill the dissenters to your opinion. Now you were able to exchange ideas and have them fight head on head in a mental cage fight. Similar to how lynchings were executed by a mob using the “I kill dissenters” method, protests would become a rather rough form of debate.
But debate means that at the end, one party wins and the other loses. In the greater scsheme of thingss, no one really wins or loses, not even the overpowered alliance of Time and Death. There is Ego within the Debate format. There is still the low vibration of “I’m right and you’re wrong.” Even though both parties are closer to each other, there is still division sowed.
The Higher Dimensional Method of Chilling: The difference between Debate and Discussion and why we should Discuss things instead of Debate over them.
Welcome to the realm of discussion where ideas flow both sacred and profane(even though nothing is ever inherently sacred or profane, save for the consciousness that perceives whether it stems from division or Unity(Source) consciousness)
If anyone has failed to notice, the main vibration of 2020 at the moment is a “You must agree with me” and that “I am right and you’re wrong.” There are constant shots being fired over and over by both sides. Sometimes physical death does occur, but spiritual growth is essentially “yeeted”
By having an immense focus on “I’m right and you’re wrong”, division is sown. By having the ideal that you yourself or some group of people(any group) is “more correct” than another, you are separating yourselves from unity.
We don’t have to agree with each other to be friends. Interestingly enough, we don’t have to disagree to be enemies.
A kew feature that I mentioned on Debate was a “flow of information.” However, there is not much “reception of information.” What most people will do in a Debate is simply talk and not listen at all. And if they are desperate they will start screaming and then kicking and then even more dense stuff.
Discussions always will have listening along with speaking.
No more will there be the negative “I am right and you are wrong” frequency being tossed around like a hot smartphone on the verge of explosion due to an ill-fated android update. What will dominate the exchange is the vibration of
I have something cool to share with you and I can’t wait to see what you have to share with me.
The Shill Vibe of Discussion
Just because they have listened does not mean they will change to your side. In an untimely twist, you might have strengthened their beliefs. But that doesn’t matter because at least growth did occur and you learned of a new idea-even if it was shitty.
Some of the hardest things to do is to listen to those who you disagree of very much. It is also very hard to listen to an idea without attempting to refute it immediately-which is a necessity in a debate. You see, ther eis value in letting that idea pass gently into your consciousness, and if it is shitty, you now know one more thing not to do.
But Debates are fun because you get those OOOHHH moments
I myself still enjoy debates. But I now have a choice. No longer will engaging someone who does not believe in what I believe feel like a competition. No longer will I feel under pressure to performto keep my “reputation” up for the sake of meager social gain. No longer will I have to be divided from the other party.
It is okay to playfight and engage in lower dimensional things. There are lessons to learn and there is a thrill that higher dimensions simply cannot provide. There is also comfort and chill that the lower dimensions simply cannot provide either. You need both. Most people in this era however has already overindulged in the lower stuff. I guess that’s why people are trying to get so high so much.
Even though I don’t stomach violence too well and am against using it especially with the knowledge of more effective and very very very less painful higher dimensional methods, I do enjoy playing CSGO and guns are really fucking cool. There’s a reason why the 80s produced Rambo and the Terminator. Did I mention dynamite?
Of course, such lower dimensional things should not be taken into lower and darker vibrations. And the power of Love literally exceeds any firearm, nuke, or doomsday device so why not use such ultimate power for causing change?
Everyone wants to be heard
If you ever do find yourself in a discussion that you intend to have an audience, set the example-as monkey see monkey do(usually). Never silence anyone just because you find them stupid, brash, or even obscene/hateful(depending on which buzzword your side likes to use) for they will just get even louder.
Of course, engaging with such negativity is not a necessity. Everyone is learning in this on hell of a multidimensional planet. If it is not their time to head back up, give them time to roll in the mud. They will eventually learn without any need for you to scream nor kick. Simply set the higher example from where there is neither resistance nor division. Plus, there’s flying cars and broomsticks up there!
The Public Domain Images I don’t have to give credit to but here they are: